urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:blueveganConfessions of a Love JunkieBlue Plastic StrawBlue Plastic Straw2006-07-28T10:15:44Zurn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:7942bluevegan @ 2006-07-28T00:26:002006-07-28T07:26:42Z2006-07-28T10:15:44ZAlas, BluePlasticStraw is one letter too long to be a username. :(<br /><br />But, I am pleased to announce that I'm moving anyway. The only thing better than a blue plastic straw is a <a href="http://bluecurlystraw.livejournal.com/">blue curly straw</a>.<br /><br />This will be the last post on this journal.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:7759Warrior2006-07-27T17:48:33Z2006-07-27T19:26:32Z<a name="cutid1"></a><div class="ljcut" text="angsty poetry">Standing, brandishing my sarcasm<br />Like a sword.<br />Ready to fend off words<br />That hurt more than any blow.<br />Your silence I am defenseless against.<br />Scream, accuse, berate, abuse<br />I can withstand it all.<br />Do not ignore me<br />Do not pretend nothing happened.<br />I cannot fight what I cannot see.<br />Show your anger<br />My armor is useless<br />You have mortally wounded<br />Without making a move.<br /><br /><br />Something from the paper journal. I like to think I'm a little less angry these days, although I'm still prone to using sarcasm as a weapon. Bad habit that.</div>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:7584Almost done2006-07-27T17:33:30Z2006-07-27T17:33:30ZI'm so burnt out on school and work I could just scream. Thank god it's my last day for both. Three glorious weeks off with nothing to do but review for the GRE. That will be a pleasurable change of pace frankly. Multiple choice questions where there is only one correct answer and a logical way of finding it. Relief for a brain overtaxed with analysis and creativity. <br /><br />I'm meant to go to Seattle this weekend for my sister's birthday party, but I'm feeling really anti-social. I just want to stay home and sleep. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:7330I Give You Back2006-07-26T05:34:45Z2006-07-26T05:42:44Z<br /><br />I release you, my beautiful and terrible<br /> fear. I release you. You were my beloved<br /> and hated twin, but now, I don't know you<br /> as myself. I release you with all the <br /> pain I would know at the death of <br /> my children.<br /><br />You are not my blood anymore. <br /><br />Oh, you have choked me, but I gave you the leash.<br />You have gutted me but I gave you the knife.<br />You have devoured me, but I laid myself across the fire.<br /><br />I take myself back, fear.<br />You are not my shadow any longer.<br />I won't hold you in my hands.<br />You can't live in my eye, my ears, my voice<br />my belly, or in my heart my heart<br />my heart my heart<br /><br />But come here, fear<br />I am alive and you are so afraid<br /> of dying.
<p><br />excerpted from a poem by Joy Harjo</p>
<p><br /> </p>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:6983Always look on the bright side of life2006-07-24T01:51:17Z2006-07-24T01:51:17ZThe upside of 100F degree weather three days in a row? I can eat (soy) ice cream for dinner and not feel guilty. Cold is a food group, right?<br /><br />So last night was a new one. I got stood up after being invited to someone's house.<br /><br />
<a name="cutid1"></a><div class="ljcut" text="The following is a reenactment">Paraphrased<br /><br />Him: You should come over and hang out, I'm feeling down and could use some company.<br />Me: Eh, it's kinda late and I have a lot of homework to do tomorrow.<br />Him: Did I mention I just bought an air conditioner? Man it's cold in my house.<br />Me: *wiping sweat from my brow* Hmmm....tempting...<br />Him: Come on, it'll be fun, we can watch Monty Python. You can sleep on the couch. <br />Me: Oh alright.<br />(20 minutes of driving later)<br />Me: *knock knock* ....<br />Me: hmm, the TV is kinda loud, maybe he didn't hear me *KNOCK KNOCK* .....<br />Me: *peeking in window, seeing nothing but floor, but the lights are on* huh, where is he?<br />Me: *dialing phone, getting voicemail* Hi, it's Jessica, I'm standing on your porch and you're not answering. Where are you? I'm gonna wait a few more minutes then I'm leaving.<br />Me: *KNOCK KNOCK once more for good measure* *knock on window* *peek in* *increasingly annoyed*<br />(3 minutes and two knocks later)<br />Me: Fuck this, I'm going home.<br />Me: *dialing and again getting voicemail* I'm going home. You suck. <br />(15 minutes driving later (I drive fast when I'm angry))<br />Me (via email): What the hell? You're an ass.<br />(The following morning)<br />Him (via email): Oh, I'm so sorry, I fell asleep.<br />Me: Grrrrr<br /></div>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:6825TV meme2006-07-23T01:44:59Z2006-07-23T01:50:08Z<a name="cutid1"></a><div class="ljcut" text="In which we discover Jessica watches far too much television.">Bold all of the following TV shows you've seen three or more episodes of in your lifetime. Bold and italicize a show if you've seen every episode. Add up to three additional shows (please keep the list in alpha order).<br /><strong><br />24</strong><br /><strong>7th Heaven</strong><br />Adam-12<br />Adventures of the Gummi Bears<br /><em><strong>Aeon Flux </strong></em>(Just bought the DVD)<br /><strong>ALF</strong><br />Alien Nation<br /><strong>Alfred Hitchcock Presents</strong><br />Alias<br />All Creatures Great and Small<br />All in the Family<br /><strong>American Idol/Pop Idol/Canadian Idol/Australian Idol/etc.</strong><br />American Gothic<br />America's Next Top Model/Germany's Next Top Model<br />Andromeda<br /><strong>Angel </strong><br />Are You Afraid of the Dark?<br /><strong>Are You Being Served?</strong><br /><strong>Arrested Development</strong><br /><em><strong>Babylon 5</strong></em><br />Babylon 5: Crusade<br /><strong>Battlestar Galactica</strong> (the old one)<br />Battlestar Galactica (the new one)<br /><strong>Baywatch </strong>(the Hoff!)<br /><strong>Beavis & Butthead</strong><br />Beverly Hills 90210<br />Big Love<br />Birds of Prey<br />Blackadder <br /><strong>Blossom</strong><br />Bonanza<br />Bones<br />Bosom Buddies<br />Boston Legal<br /><strong>Boy Meets World<br />Buffy the Vampire Slayer</strong><br />Bug Juice<br />Butterflies<br />Carnivale<br />Chappelle's Show<br />Charlie's Angels<br /><strong>Charmed<br />Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers<br />Cheers<br />Chicago Hope</strong><br />Columbo<br />Commander in Chief<br />Coupling - UK<br /><strong>Cowboy Bebop</strong><br /><strong>Crossing Jordan </strong>(never by choice, my mom likes it)<br /><strong>CSI<br />CSI: Miami</strong><br />CSI: NY<br />Curb Your Enthusiasm<br />Dancing with the Stars<br /><strong>Danny Phantom </strong><br /><em><strong>Daria</strong></em><strong><br />Dark Angel </strong><br />Dark Skies<br />Davinci's Inquest<br />Dawson's Creek<br />Dead Like Me<br />Deadliest Catch<br />Deadwood<br /><strong>Degrassi High</strong><br />Degrassi: The Next Generation<br /><strong>Designing Women</strong><br />Desperate Housewives<br /><strong>Dharma & Greg<br />Different Strokes</strong><br />Dinosaurs<br /><strong>Doctor Who</strong><br /><strong>Dougie Howser, M.D.</strong><br />Dragon Ball Z<br />Dragnet<br />Drake & Josh<br /><strong>Duck Tales</strong><br />Duckman <br />Due South<br />Earth 2<br />Emergency!<br />Entourage<br /><strong>ER</strong><br />Everwood<br /><strong>Everybody Loves Raymond<br />Extreme Makeover: Home Edition<br />Facts of Life<br />Family Guy</strong><br />Family Matters<br />Family Ties<br /><em><strong>Farscape </strong></em>(way better than Lexx <em>Leo</em> >_>)<br />Father Ted<br />Fawlty Towers<br />Felicity<br />Firefly<br /><strong>Frasier<br />Freaks and Geeks<br />Friends<br />Futurama<br />Gargoyles<br />Get Smart</strong><br />Ghost Hunters<br /><strong>Gilligan's Island<br />Gilmore Girls</strong><br />Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C.<br />Green Acres<br />Green Wing<br />Grey's Anatomy<br /><strong>Growing Pains</strong><br />Gundam Wing<br />Gunsmoke<br />Hannah Montana<br /><strong>Happy Days</strong><br /><strong>Hercules the Legendary Journeys</strong><br />Here Come the Brides<br />Hex<br />Highlander<br />Hogan's Heroes<br /><strong>Home Improvement</strong><br /><em><strong>Homicide: Life on the Street </strong></em>(So much better than any of the Law & Order shows)<br /><strong>House</strong><br /><strong>I Dream of Jeannie<br />I Love Lucy</strong><br />I Spy<br />Inuyasha<br /><strong>Invader Zim</strong><br />Invasion<br /><strong>Iron Chef (Japan)<br />Iron Chef (US) </strong><br />It Takes A Thief<br />Hell's Kitchen<br />JAG<br />Jackass<br /><strong>Jeopardy</strong><br /><strong>Joey </strong>(oh, the shame)<br />John Doe<br />Keen Eddie<br />Kingdom Hospital<br />Kitchen Confidential<br />Kolchak: The Night Stalker (original)<br />Kolchak: The Night Stalker (reincarnation)<br /><strong>La Femme Nikita</strong><br />LA Law<br /><strong>Late Night with Conan O'Brien<br />Law and Order<br />Law and Order: SVU<br />Law and Order: Criminal Intent</strong><br />Laverne and Shirley<br /><strong>Lexx </strong><br />Life On Mars<br /><strong>Little House on the Prairie</strong><br />Lizzie McGuire<br /><strong>Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman</strong><br />Lost<br />Lost in Space<br />Love, American Style<br /><strong>M*A*S*H<br />MacGyver<br />Malcolm in the Middle</strong><br />Married... With Children<br /><strong>Melrose Place</strong> (my freshman year roommate watched it obsessively, I got sucked in for half a season)<br />Miami Vice<br />Mission: Impossible<br /><strong>Mister Roger's Neighborhood</strong><br />Mod Squad<br /><strong>Monk</strong><br /><strong>Monty Python's Flying Circus</strong><br /><strong>Moonlighting<br />Mork & Mindy</strong><br />Muppets Tonight<br />Murder She Wrote<br /><strong>Murphy Brown</strong><br />My Life as a Dog<br />My Three Sons<br /><strong>My Two Dads</strong><br /><strong>NCIS</strong><br />Ned Bigby's Declassifed School Survival Guide<br />Nip/Tuck<br /><strong>Northern Exposure </strong>(added)<br /><strong>Numb3rs</strong><br />One Tree Hill<br /><strong>Oz</strong><br /><strong>Penn & Teller's Bullshit</strong><br />Perry Mason<br />Pokemon<br />Popular<br />Power Rangers<br />Prey<br />Prison Break<br />Profiler<br />Project Runway<br /><strong>Quantum Leap</strong><br />Queer As Folk (US)<br />Queer as Folk (British)<br /><strong>Queer Eye for the Straight Guy</strong><br />Quincy ME<br />Reba<br />Red Dwarf<br />ReGenesis<br />Relic Hunter<br />Remington Steele<br />Rescue Me<br /><strong>Road Rules</strong><br />Rome<br /><strong>Roseanne</strong><br />Roswell<br />Sailor Moon<br />Sapphire and Steel<br /><strong>Saved by the Bell</strong><br /><strong>Scrap Heap Challenge</strong><br /><strong>Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?</strong><br /><strong>Scrubs<br />Seaquest DSV<br />Seinfeld<br />Sesame Street<br />Sex and the City</strong><br />Six Feet Under<br />Sliders <br />Slings and Arrows<br /><strong>Smallville</strong><br />So Weird<br /><strong>South Park</strong><br />Space: Above & Beyond<br />Spaced<br /><strong>Spongebob Squarepants</strong><br />Spooks/MI-5<br />Sports Night<br />Square Pegs<br /><strong>Star Trek <br />Star Trek: The Next Generation<br /><em>Star Trek: Deep Space Nine </em></strong>(my favorite Trek)<br /><strong>Star Trek: Voyager </strong>(grew weary after they lost their 20th or so shuttlecraft)<strong><br />Star Trek: Enterprise </strong>(apparently the Borg aren't the only ones with implants)<br /><strong>Stargate SG-1</strong><br />Starsky & Hutch<br />Strange Luck<br />Strictly Come Dancing/Dancing with the Stars etc<br />Sugar Rush<br />Superman<br />Supernatural<br />Surface<br /><strong>Survivor</strong><br /><strong>Taxi</strong><br />Teen Titans<br /><strong>Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles</strong><br /><strong>That 70's Show<br />That's So Raven </strong>(The only kids show I don't mind watching with my niece)<br />The 4400<br /><strong>The Addams Family</strong><br />The Andy Griffith Show<br /><strong>The A-Team</strong><br />The Avengers<br />The Beverly Hillbillies<br />The Bob Newhart Show (1970s)<br />The Bold & the Beautiful<br /><strong>The Brady Bunch</strong><br />The Champions<br /><strong>The Colbert Report<br />The Cosby Show<br />The Daily Show<br />The Dead Zone</strong><br />The Dick Van Dyke Show<br /><strong>The Drew Carey Show<br />The Flintstones<br />The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air<br />The Golden Girls</strong><br />The Goodies<br />The Honeymooners<br />The Invisible Man (2000s)<br />The Jeffersons<br /><strong>The Jetsons</strong><br />The L Word<br /><strong>The Love Boat</strong><br />The Magnificent Seven<br />The Man from Atlantis<br />The Man from U.N.C.L.E.<br /><strong>The Mary Tyler Moore Show</strong><br />The Mighty Boosh<br />The Monkees<br />The Munsters<br /><strong>The Muppet Show </strong><br /><strong>The Mythbusters</strong><br />The O.C.<br />The Office (UK)<br />The Office (US)<br />The Outer Limits<br />The Partridge Family<br />The Phoenix<br /><strong>The Powerpuff Girls</strong><br />The Practice<br />The Pretender<br />The Prisoner<br />The Professionals<br /><strong>The Real World</strong><br />The Rose of Versailles<br />The Saint<br />The Sentinel<br />The Shield<br /><strong>The Simpsons </strong><br />The Six Million Dollar Man<br /><strong>The Sopranos</strong><br />The Suite Life of Zack and Cody<br />The Sweeney<br /><strong>The Tonight Show with Jay Leno<br />The Twilight Zone (original)<br />The Twilight Zone (reincarnation)</strong><br />The Unit<br />The Waltons<br /><strong>The West Wing</strong><br />The Wire<br /><strong>The Wonder Years<br />The X-Files </strong><br />The Young Ones<br />Third Watch<br /><strong>Three's Company</strong><br />Threshold<br />Top Gear<br />Touching Evil (UK)<br /><strong>Twin Peaks</strong><br />Twitch City<br />Undeclared<br />Veronica Mars<br /><strong>What Not To Wear (US) </strong>(total guilty pleasure)<br /><strong>Whose Line is it Anyway? (US)<br />Whose Line is it Anyway? (UK) </strong><br />Wild Wild West<br /><strong>Will and Grace<br />Wings</strong><br />Wire in the Blood<br />Without a Trace<br />WKRP in Cincinnati <br /><strong><em>Wonderfalls </em></strong>(FOX <em>sucks</em> for canceling it after four episodes)<strong><br />Xena: Warrior Princess <br />X-Men: The Animated Series<br />X-Men: Evolution<br />You Can't Do That On Television<br />Zoom</strong></div>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:6455nerd haiku2006-07-22T19:09:57Z2006-07-22T19:09:57ZControl rods are pulled<br />Chain reactions can't be stopped<br />A lust Chernobylurn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:6153bluevegan @ 2006-07-21T18:20:002006-07-22T01:27:09Z2006-07-22T01:27:09ZToo hot<br /><br />Can't move<br /><br />Sent ice cream staturn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:6009Feeling hot hot hot2006-07-18T18:41:19Z2006-07-18T18:54:37ZIt's supposed to be over 100F here AGAIN later in the week. What happened to those temperate summers we're supposed to have here in the Northwest? Mainly I worry about the felines. I can go hide out in the air conditioned library to get relief, the kitties don't have that luxury. Last time it got hot I considered wetting them down, but I think that would stress them out more than the heat.<br /><br />This past weekend was a lot of fun. A friend from Ok Cupid was in town and what was planned to be a movie and dinner on Saturday turned into hanging out all Saturday night and most of Sunday. I didn't get nearly as much school work done as I had planned, but it was worth it. Much amusement was had. <br /><br />Less than two weeks left in summer session. Time flies when you're stressed out! I need to get away for a couple weekends later in the summer/fall, just to have some fun. I haven't done enough of that.<br /><br />And now, a chance for my friends to express an opinion which will influence my future! Relax, it's not all that exciting. I created this LJ about a month before I decided to start using BluePlasticStraw just about everywhere online. I would like to change my username here, for the sake of consistency and because I don't want "vegan" to be a main part of my identity (for a variety of reasons). It costs $15 to change a username. What is your opinion on a name change? Should I just quit worrying about it? urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:5798Meme madness2006-07-11T07:17:41Z2006-07-11T07:17:41Z(<a href="http://pyesetz.furtopia.org/meme-3col-DeathNote.html">Click here</a> to post your own answers for this meme.)<br /><br /><table style="background-color: white" border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="6">
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I miss somebody right now.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I don't watch much <b>TV</b> these days.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I own lots of <b>books</b>. <small><i>(I seriously downsized my book collection the last time I moved.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I wear <b>glasses</b> or contact lenses.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I love to play <b>video games</b>. <small><i>(I like watching other people play them, but I suck at them and I'm not patient enough to not suck.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I've tried <b>marijuana</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Not a big fan. Makes my brain feel mushy.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I've watched <b>porn</b> movies.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have been the <b>psycho-ex</b> in a past relationship.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I believe <b>honesty</b> is usually the best policy.</span></u></span></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I <b>curse</b> sometimes.</span></u></span> <small><i>(damnhellass)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.</span></u></span> <small><i>(moderate to severe major depression ------> mostly stable and happy)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I carry my <b>knife</b>/razor everywhere with me.</td>
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</table><a name="cutid1"></a>* * * * *<table style="background-color: white" border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="6">
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have broken someone's <b>bones</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Stepped on the awkwardly placed pinky of one of my classmates in third grade.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have a secret that I am <b>ashamed</b> to reveal.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I hate the <b>rain</b>. <small><i>(In the summer time, when the sun shines for weeks, I miss the rain.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm <b>paranoid</b> at times.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I would get <b>plastic surgery</b> if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Having the girls reduced to a more manageable size would be nice.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I need/<b>want money</b> right now.</span></u></span> <small><i>(The best things in live are free<br />But you can give em to the birds and the bees)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I love <b>sushi</b>.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I talk really, really fast.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have fresh <b>breath</b> in the morning. <small><i>(post brushing, yes)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have long <b>hair</b>. <small><i>(Not by female standards I suppose.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have <b>lost money</b> in Las Vegas. <small><i>(gambling is dorky)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have at least one <b>sibling</b>.</span></u></span></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I was born in a <b>country</b> outside of the U.S.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have worn <b>fake hair</b>/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.</span></u></span> <small><i>(fake nails once, never again)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I couldn't survive without <b>Caller I.D.</b></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I like the way that I look.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Most days)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have <b>lied</b> to a good friend in the last 6 months.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am usually <b>pessimistic</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have a lot of <b>mood swings</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I think <b>prostitution</b> should be legalized. <small><i>(Meh, mixed feelings on this.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I <b>slept</b> with a <b>roommate</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(I suppose he was only a roommate in name)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have a <b>hidden talent</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm <b>always hyper</b> no matter how much sugar I have.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have a lot of <b>friends</b>. <small><i>(Quality over quantity)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have pecked someone of the <b>same sex</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(among other things)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I enjoy talking on the <b>phone</b>. </span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I practically live in <b>sweatpants</b> or PJ pants. <small><i>(sweatpants are yucky)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I love to shop and/or <b>window shop</b>. <small><i>(Gadgets, electronics, kitchen stuff - yes)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm obsessed with my Xanga or <b>Livejournal</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my <b>mother</b>. <small><i>(My mom's cool.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have a <b>mobile phone</b>.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have passed out <b>drunk</b> in the past 6 months.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I've rejected someone before.</span></u></span></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I currently <b>like/love</b> someone.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Unrequited like. I have the romantic sensibilities of a 14 year old.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life. <small><i>(I'm on a pretty well defined path.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I want to have <b>children</b> in the future. <small><i>(Not so much)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have changed a <b>diaper</b> before.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I've called the cops on a friend before.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Does my dad count?)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm not <b>allergic</b> to anything. <small><i>(Codeine makes me barf.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have a lot to learn.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am shy around the opposite sex.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm online 24/7, even as an away message.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have at least 5 <b>away messages</b> saved.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black"> I have tried <b>alcohol</b> or <b>drugs</b> before.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have made a move on a <b>friend's significant other</b> or crush in the past.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I own the <b>"South Park"</b> movie.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have avoided assignments at work/school to be on Xanga or <b>Livejournal</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I enjoy some <b>country music</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(None of that twangy pop stuff though.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I would die for my best <b>friends</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I'm <b>obsessive</b>, and often a <b>perfectionist</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Perfectionism is the bane of my existence.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have used my <b>sexuality</b> to advance my career.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I think <b>Halloween</b> is awesome because you get free candy.</span></u></span> <small><i>(I'm more about the costumes, but candy is good too.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have <b>dated</b> a close <b>friend's ex</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I am <b>happy</b> at this moment.</span></u></span></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm obsessed with <b>guys</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black"><b>Democrat</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(More on the Socialist end of things.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> <b>Republican</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> <b>I don't even know what I am</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am <b>punk</b> rockish.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I go for older guys/girls, not younger. <small><i>(I tend to relate better to people younger than me. Probably because I'm immature.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I study for <b>tests</b> most of the time.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I tie my <b>shoelaces</b> differently from anyone I've ever met.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I can work on a <b>car</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(I can change the oil, if I have to, but I prefer to pay someone else.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I love my <b>job(s)</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Most days.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I am comfortable with who I am right now.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Comfortable, yes. Content to stay the same, no.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have more than just my <b>ears pierced</b>. <small><i>(Not yet)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I walk <b>barefoot</b> wherever I can. <small><i>(too many sidewalk spitters, urgh)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have <b>jumped</b> off a <b>bridge</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I love sea <b>turtles</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(flippery goodness)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I spend ridiculous amounts of money on <b>makeup</b>. <small><i>(gods no)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I plan on achieving a <b>major goal</b>/dream.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Graduating college next year is a major goal.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am proficient on a <b>musical instrument</b>. <small><i>(Not anymore. The violin skills have faded, the guitar skills are not proficient yet.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I hate <b>office jobs</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Did those for too many years. Never again.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I went to college out of state.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am <b>adopted</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am a <b>pyro</b>. </td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have thrown up from crying too much. <small><i>(o.O)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have been intentionally hurt by people that I loved.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Messy ugly breakup, yuck.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I fall for the worst people.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I adore <b>bright colours</b>.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I usually like covers better than originals. </td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I hate chain theme restaurants like <b>Applebees</b> and <b>TGIFridays</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Not many vegan options.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I can pick up things with my toes. <small><i>(I have non-prehensile Fred Flintstone toes)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I can't <b>whistle</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have ridden/owned a <b>horse</b>.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I still have every <b>journal</b> I've ever written in.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I talk in my sleep.</span></u></span> <small><i>(On rare occasions.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I've often thought that I was born in the wrong <b>century</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I wear a <b>toe ring</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have a <b>tattoo</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I can't stand at LEAST one person that I work with. <small><i>(My co-workers are awesome.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am a <b>caffeine</b> junkie. <small><i>(I prefer "connoisseur".)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am completely <b>tree-huggy spiritual</b>, and I'm not ashamed at all.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> If I knew I would get away with it, I would commit at least one <b>murder</b>. <small><i>(O.o)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I will <b>collect</b> anything, and the more nonsensical, the better. <small><i>(I prefer simplicity)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I enjoy a nice glass of <b>wine</b> with dinner.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Sometimes)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm an <b>artist</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am <b>ambidextrous</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I sleep with so many <b>stuffed animals</b>, I can hardly fit on my bed.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> If it weren't for having to see other people naked, I'd live in a <b>nudist colony</b>. <small><i>(I'm ok with nudity, but not colonies.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have terrible <b>teeth</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I hate my <b>toes</b>. <small><i>(I'm ok with them, even if they are non-prehensile.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I did this meme even though I wasn't tagged by the person who took it before me.</span></u></span> <small><i>(tags? bah!)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have more <b>friends</b> on the internet than in real life. <small><i>(Depends how you quantify "friend")</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have lived in either three different <b>states or countries</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am extremely <b>flexible</b>. <small><i>(moderately)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I love <b>hugs</b> more than <b>kisses</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Slight edge for snuggles.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I want to own my <b>own business</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I <b>smoke</b>. <small><i>(Bleh)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I spend way too much time on the <b>computer</b> than on anything else.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Working on this)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">Nobody has ever said I'm <b>normal</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Who ever says "hey, you're normal"?)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">Sad movies, games, and the like can cause a trickle of <b>tears</b> every now and then.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am proficient in the use of many types of <b>firearms</b> and combat weapons. <small><i>(knowledgeable, but not proficient)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I like the way women look in stylized men's suits.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I don't like it when people are <b>unpleased</b> or seem unpleased with me.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Why can't we all just get along?)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have been described as a <b>dreamer</b> or likely to have my head up in the clouds.</span></u></span> <small><i>("Jessica lacks focus in class and has a hard time finishing her work.")</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have played <b>strip poker</b> with someone else before.</span></u></span> <br /><small><i>(As opposed to playing it with myself?)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have had emotional problems for which I have sought professional help.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I believe in <b>ghosts</b> and the paranormal.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I can't stand being <b>alone</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have at least one <b>obsession</b> at any given time.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I <b>weigh</b> myself, pee/poo, and then weigh myself again. <small><i>(I don't need to know how much my excrement weighs.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I consistently spend way too much <b>money</b> on obsessions-of-the-moment.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm a judgmental <b>asshole</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm a HUGE <b>drama-queen</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have travelled on more than one <b>continent</b>. <small><i>(Not yet)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I sometimes wish my father would just disappear.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I need people to tell me I'm good at something in order to feel that I am.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Praise is good, but I'm self-contained.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am a <b>Libertarian</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I can speak more than one <b>language</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I can fall asleep even if the whole room is as noisy as it can be.</span></u></span> <small><i>(If I'm verrry tired.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I would rather <b>read</b> than watch TV.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I like reading <b>fact</b> more than fiction. <small><i>(Equal like for fiction and non)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have pulled an all-nighter on an assignment I was given a month to do.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Worst study-habits EVER.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have no <b>piercings</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have spent the night in a <b>train station</b> or other public place.</span></u></span> <small><i>(those airport chairs make terrible beds)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have been so upset over my physical <b>gender</b> that I cried.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I once spent Christmas completely alone because there was a miscommunication on which parent was supposed to have me that night.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">There have been times when I have wondered <b>"Why was I born?"</b> and may/may not have cried over it.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Depression makes one think weird things.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I like most <b>animals</b> better than most people.</span></u></span></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I own a collection of retro <b>games consoles</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> The thought of physical exercise makes me shiver.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have hit someone with a <b>dead fish</b>. <small><i>(only textually)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am compulsively <b>honest</b>. <small><i>(Not compulsively)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I was born with a <b>congenital birth defect</b> that has never been repaired.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have <b>danced topless</b> in front of dozens of complete strangers.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have gone from wishing I was a girl to revelling in being a boy to feeling like a girl again in the span of five minutes, and not cared a whit for my actual <b>sex</b>. <small><i>(what the...?)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I am unashamedly <b>bisexual</b>, and have different motivations for my desires for different genders.</span></u></span> <small><i>(I prefer ambisexterous)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I sometimes won't sleep a whole night or eat a whole day because I forget to. <small><i>(Haven't forgotten to eat in some time.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I find it impossible to get to sleep without some kind of music on.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I dislike <b>milk</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Cow-secretions are yucky. Soy milk is a-ok.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I <b>obsessively wash</b> my hands.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Children are filthy plague carriers.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I always <b>carry</b> something significant around with me.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> Sometimes I'd rather wear a <b>wig</b> in day-to-day life than use my own hair.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I've pushed myself to become more <b>self-aware</b> and thereby more aware of others. <small><i>(self-awareness doesn't have any bearing on awareness of others)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> Even though I live on my own I still cry sometimes because I miss my <b>mother</b>. <small><i>(Uh, no.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I hand wrote all the <b>HTML</b> tags in this document. <small><i>(what HTML?)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I've liked something which a majority of people claimed was either bad or <b>weird</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Wonderfalls and ketchup on saltines.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have been <b>clinically dead</b> for a brief period of time.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> Instead of feeling sympathy/<b>empathy</b> with people and their problems, I simply become annoyed. <small><i>(Most times no.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I participate/have participated in <b>auto drag races</b> and won.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I do not 'get' most <b>comedy acts</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I don't think <b>strippers</b> are money-greedy or slutty for dancing.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I don't like to <b>chew gum</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I am obsessed with history/historical things and can't wait for someone to build a <b>time machine</b> so I can be the first to use it.</span></u></span> <small><i>(My desire for a TARDIS is independent of my interest in history.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I can never remember for the life of me where I <b>parked the car</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I had the <b>TEEN ANGST</b> thing going for at least 2-3 years.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I wish people would be more <b>empathic and honest</b> with each other.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Although sometimes I wish they'd all just shut up.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I play <b>Dungeons and Dragons</b> weekly. <small><i>(I don't have the attention span for RPGs.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I love to <b>sing</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(I don't care if I sing badly.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I want to live in my <b>mother's basement</b> when I grow up.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I have a custom-built <b>computer</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I want to create a certain someone's <b>babies</b>, even though there's a 0% possiblity of ever achieving it. <small><i>(Babies?Ew. Baby-making activities? yum)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I would be in a relationship with one of my <b>pets</b> if they were human. <small><i>(I love my cats, but I don't *love* my cats)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I've gone <b>skinny-dipping</b>.</span></u></span></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I've performed in three <b>plays</b>.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I enjoy <b>burritos</b>.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Where's my burrito? Where's my burrito? Where's my burrito? Ow!)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm <b>Irish</b> and loving it.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I have a thing for <b>redheads</b>.</span></u></span></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I am a <b>twin</b>!</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> Most of the times, I'd rather do something intellectual instead of doing something generically 'fun'.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> Once I set out to finish something, I always stay at it until it is completed before I move on to something else. <small><i>(I'm easily distrac....ooh, shiny.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I wish there were a way to erase past mistakes. <small><i>(If I've learned anything from watching sci-fi it's that meddling in the past is never a good idea.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I <b>sleep</b> more than 12 hours a day.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I wish I could be <b>prouder</b> of what I've accomplished, but it's never enough.</td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I need more time to myself. <small><i>(I need a little less time to myself.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I wish I was more <b>open-minded</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I hope that I go really prematurely grey. <small><i>(bit late for prematurely)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I <b>download</b> songs from the internet. <small><i>(Hey...is this some sort of RIAA dragnet?)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I've just reenacted chapter 58 of <b>Death Note</b> with my best friend.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I say <b>random</b> things to freak people out. <small><i>(I don't do it to freak people out.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I'm still a little mad about the ending of <b>Death Note</b>.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I love playing <b>Truth or Dare</b>. <small><i>(Eh, I'm boring and always pick truth.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I love listening to <b>slow music</b>, but I hate singing to it. <small><i>(I'll sing anything.)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> Music helps me remember that I am not alone. <small><i>(Only that one Michael Jackson song.)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> Playing my favorite <b>sport</b> makes me temporarily forget my problems.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"><span style="color:red"><b style="font-family: Arial Unicode MS">✓</b> <u><span style="color:black">I think this <b>survey</b> is particularly long.</span></u></span> <small><i>(Will it never end?!)</i></small></td>
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<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I prefer my <b>LJ friends</b> to my real-life ones.</td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I can only hate someone that I love. <small><i>(What the hell is with these questions?)</i></small></td>
<td style="color:black; background-color:white"> <b style="color:blue">×</b> I've ordered an extra two shots of espresso to an Americano at <b>Starbucks</b>. <small><i>(I don't really like Americano and certainly not at Starbucks.)</i></small></td>
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</table>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:5573Shameless objectification2006-07-09T19:17:37Z2006-07-09T19:18:28ZSoccer players are definitely the hottest athletes.<br /><br />Oh, those legs, and every time one lifts up his shirt, washboard abs. <br /><br />I love World Cup.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:5278Updates2006-07-04T00:35:24Z2006-07-04T00:39:56Z<a name="cutid1"></a><div class="ljcut" text="More GRE blathering">I got my official GRE scores with the percentiles. Verbal was 96th percentile, Quantitative was 37th (ouch). My Analytical Writing score was surprisingly poor (4 out of 6) even though I thought I'd done ok. I'm going to talk to Todd again about taking it in August and then get myself signed up. A high Quantitative score isn't that big a deal for a humanities student, but I <em>know</em> I can improve over that dismal result. I also really need to figure out how to get a better score on the writing portion, because that is pretty important. <br /></div>
<br />On a happier note, the threat of chicken pox has passed, it turned out to be just an allergic reaction. I'm still going to ask about getting my antibodies tested when I go to the doctor on Thursday. I spend enough time around the little plague carriers that I need all the immunity I can get.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:4976False alarms2006-07-03T10:45:44Z2006-07-03T10:48:40ZI got a couple itchy spots on my arms, but those were just mosquito bites. So far I am pox free, but the incubation period is 10-21 days so I'm not in the clear yet. Of course, I have no idea if the kid in question even has chickenpox. It's likely that she didn't and all this worry is for nothing. <br /><br />I'm also not sleeping again, which is frustrating.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:4713A pox upon you2006-06-30T05:52:37Z2006-06-30T05:52:37ZI've never had chicken pox. I got half of the vaccine when I was around 20, but my insurance ran out so I never went back for the booster. One of the kids at work broke out in spots on her face today. None on her belly or back, though, (at least when her mom came to pick her up) and she seemed to be feeling fine. Still, I'm freaking out a little.<br /><br /><i>Adults who get chicken pox usually have a much more severe, prolonged case than children. Pneumonia is common. The rate of hospitalization for chickenpox is almost 900% higher in adults than in children. Adults are more than 20 times more likely to die from this disease.</i><br /><br />Auuuugh!<br /><br />I'm going to call my doctor and tell her I want to get vaccinated when I have my appointment next week.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:4372Lacking journal motivation2006-06-26T04:53:13Z2006-06-26T04:53:13ZI keep meaning to update, but I'm really feeling unmotivated.<br /><br />I did the GRE, I got 620 on the Verbal, which is ok and 560 on the Quantitative, which is pretty shitty. I haven't gotten my Analytical writing score yet, but I feel like I did pretty well.<br /><br />I've already decided I'm going to take it again in August before classes start. Lee has kindly offered to help me prep for the Quantitative portion, so I'm hoping that I'll be able to raise my score on that section. I think I can do better on the Verbal as well, since I spent very little time prepping for that.<br /><br />I'm working 18-20 hours per week, plus doing summer classes which are really intense, so I'm pretty busy all around, but it feels good to be doing productive stuff.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:4285Ssssstresssss!2006-06-15T00:35:07Z2006-06-15T00:35:07ZI'm taking the GRE in less than 48 hours. I feel completely unprepared, even though I've been reviewing for several weeks. All that anxiety that I've been compartmentalizing is busting out at the seams. I feel like I'm going to cry or puke or maybe both. I've been having anxiety dreams for a week. When I can sleep, that is, which I've not been doing much of. Waking up several times a night with my heart pounding out of my chest can't be healthy. <br /><br />Everyone keeps telling me to calm down, and I know I'm being irrational, but I can't help it. I have <i>never</i> had this kind of test anxiety before, so I have no idea how to deal with it. <br /><br />One way or the other it'll be over after Friday morning. I'm going in with a pessimistic attitude, so I'll be braced for bad news, or pleasantly surprised by good. Worst case scenario, if I totally bomb the thing I can retake it in August. I've already set aside the $115 registration fee in my budget, that's the level of my fatalism right now.<br /><br />I'm gonna go meditate now. Maybe I'll just have beer instead.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:4058For Claudia, Against Narrowness2006-06-11T17:50:07Z2006-06-11T17:51:49ZFrom <i>Loveroot</i> by Erica Jong<br /><br />Narrowing life because of the fears,<br />narrowing it between the dust motes,<br />narrowing the pink baby<br />between the green-limbed monsters,<br />& the drooling idiots,<br />& the ghosts of the Thalidomide infants,<br />narrowing hope,<br />always narrowing hope.<br /><br />Mother sits on one shoulder hissing:<br />Life is dangerous.<br />Father sits on the other sighing:<br />Lucky you.<br />Grandmother, grandfather, big sister:<br />You'll die if you leave us,<br />you'll die if you ever leave us.<br /><br />Sweetheart, baby sister,<br />you'll die anyway<br />& so will I.<br />Even if you walk the wide greensward,<br />even if you<br />& your beautiful big belly<br />embrace the world of men & trees,<br />even if you moan with pleasure,<br />& smoke the sweet grass<br />& feast on strawberries in bed,<br />you'll die anyway--<br />wide or narrow,<br />you're going to die.<br /><br />As long as you're at it,<br />die wide.<br />Follow your belly to the green pasture.<br />Lie down in the sun's dapple.<br />Life is not as dangerous<br />as mother said.<br />It is more dangerous,<br />more wide.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:3685bluevegan @ 2006-05-11T20:02:002006-05-12T03:11:31Z2006-05-12T03:11:31ZGrades posted today and the verdict is...meh. One class was better than I expected, the others were about what I thought. Not horrible, but certainly nothing close to what I'm capable of. Now that my emotional stuff is a little more under control, classes should go better.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:3428Emotional packing peanuts2006-05-11T00:07:17Z2006-05-11T00:07:17ZToday's pet peeve: "friends" who, upon acquiring a significant other, disappear. I know reduced contact is to be expected, but a phone call or email now and then would be nice. Ah well, I can't nag people into being my friend. <br /><br />Grades for Spring semester are supposed to post sometime today. I'm trying not to be too anxious. I also registered to take the GRE on June 16th. With a little over a month to prepare I should be fine.<br /><br />It's weird to think that I'll be a Senior next year. My college experience has dragged on for so many years, in fits and starts, that actually having an endpoint in view is exciting, and a bit scary. I have been putting one foot in front of the other, concentrating on getting through classes one semester at a time, but now I have to begin looking towards the future.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:3313Now I know how Roberta Flack felt2006-05-09T06:26:07Z2006-05-10T07:17:31ZSometimes songs just cut to the bone.<br /><br />Not Pretty Enough<br />Kasey Chambers<br /><br />Am I not pretty enough<br />Is my heart too broken<br />Do I cry too much<br />Am I too outspoken<br />Don't I make you laugh<br />Should I try it harder<br />Why do you see right through me<br /><br />I live, I breathe, I let it rain on me<br />I sleep, I wake, I try hard not to break<br />I crave, I love, I've waited long enough<br />I try as hard as I can<br /><br />Am I not pretty enough<br />Is my heart too broken<br />Do I cry too much<br />Am I too outspoken<br />Don't I make you laugh<br />Should I try it harder<br />Why do you see right through me<br /><br />I laugh, I feel, I make believe it's real<br />I fall, I freeze, I pray down on my knees<br />I hope, I stand, I take it like a man<br />I try as hard as I can<br /><br />Am I not pretty enough<br />Is my heart too broken<br />Do I cry too much<br />Am I too outspoken<br />Don't I make you laugh<br />Should I try it harder<br />Why do you see right through me<br /><br />Why do you see<br />Why do you see<br />Why do you see right through me<br /><br />There’s some irony in Kasey Chambers singing this, seeing as she’s gorgeous.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:3024I should know better by now2006-05-09T05:22:46Z2006-05-09T05:22:46ZAs soon as I mention that I'm feeling better, I have a bad day, or, in this case, a series of days. The last couple days I've been irritable and increasingly melancholy. I thought I was feeling off because I forgot to take the second dose of my meds two days in a row, but today I took everything like normal and I feel worse. <br /><br />I'm so frustrated because I have absolutely no reason to be feeling crappy. The last couple days have been really good, I've gone out with friends, visited with family, gone shopping, relaxed and slept in a few times. Everything is going really well, so why do I feel lonely and isolated and really really bad about myself? That nasty negative internal dialog has been creeping back in and, as usual, I feel completely powerless to stop it. I really hope this is just a temporary set-back.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:2741Let the summer begin!2006-05-05T04:18:12Z2006-05-05T04:18:12Z<a name="cutid1"></a><div class="ljcut" text="Another cute doggie"><img src="http://www.southwesthumane.org/images/15312_Carrot_Top.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<br />That's Carrot Top, she's got a dumb name (IMO), but she's a cool dog. She's mellow when she's on-leash, but as soon as I let her go in the yard, she RUNS with that tongue out ecstatic look dogs get when they're blissed out on just being a dog. She's also really smart. Today I used a treat to lure her into a "down" twice and the next time I pulled out a treat she sat looking at me expectantly for about 10 seconds and then lay down all on her own. I love it when that happens!<br /><br />So, here we are at the beginning of May, but for me it's already summer break. I took my only final exam and turned in two papers yesterday, so I'm done with classes until the start of Summer session in a month. I'm not sure how I'm going to do as far as grades. I finished strong, but that depressive episode mid-semester really put a hurt on my overall scores. I'm fairly certain I'll pass everything, but I think there are going to be a couple Cs. I'm trying not to let it bother me too much, but I am disappointed, and concerned about my overall GPA. <br /><br />Thus far, the depression appears to have retreated and I am feeling cautiously optimistic at this point. I'm going to stick with this course of treatment, since it seems to be helping. The real test will be seeing how stable I can remain next winter, but that's a long way off. I was fortunate enough to discover that GlaxoSmithKline has a program that offers subsidized medication for low-income people. I was approved for the program, so I'm able to get my meds for just a fraction of what they normally cost. Between that and finding out I'm eligible for the state's Basic Health plan I'm feeling much better about my health care situation. I'm working just two days a week for rest of May, which gives me lots of free time to relax and start thinking about plans for the future, and possibly study for the GRE if I can get scheduled to take it this summer. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:2419bluevegan @ 2006-04-30T11:13:002006-04-30T18:25:14Z2006-05-04T19:35:04ZUrgh, I'm having one of those days were I piss people off no matter what I do. I even acted snarky towards my ex for no particular reason. I want to go back to bed. I think I'll go to the library to work on my paper instead.urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:bluevegan:544Moving2006-04-29T02:18:03Z2006-05-04T19:36:57ZAfter much consideration, I've decided to move my fresh new blog from Blogger to LiveJournal. While I have disparaged LJ in the past, it does have the distinct advantage of allowing me to control who is reading my posts. There have been posts that I wanted to make over on Blogger, but releasing them into the ether was rather discomforting. <strike>Most</strike> Some of my posts are going to be friends only, so if you want to read, leave me a note.